Following Part 1 of this series, a number of readers have naturally asked me to feature Ian Russell as the immediate follow-up.
Who he?
You will know him better as Hamilton Accies most famous ever supporter, the most famous ever ‘Fergie’ associated with Scottish football.
I’m not entirely sure how someone of the name Ian Russell came to be known as ‘Fergie’ and perhaps some reader may be able to enlighten us - but whatever the reason, Fergie was one of the most distinctive and well-known football supporters in Scotland in his heyday.
Before I go any further I should say two things
(1) My correspondent Bobby imparted some very sad news when commenting on Nutters Part 1 -
“Sadly earlier this season prior to a trip to Hamilton I read on a messageboard that although Fergie is alive he no longer gets to the games. He is confined to a home after receiving a needless kicking by some “non aspirational working class type adolescents” (i.e. wee f*cking scumbags).
This is unsubstantiated of course but it would be pretty tragic if true. Doubly so given how his beloved team are doing this season.
Not that it would have changed his approach in anyway“.
Elsewhere I have read that these wee scumbags actually broke into Fergie’s house, about 3 years ago, and beat him so severely that since then Fergie has been seriously disabled and confined to a care home. He must be a fair age now.
(2) There are many, many anecdotes about Fergie’s lifetime activities at the fitba, and my intention is to celebrate his ‘unorthodoxy’ - he was a man of limited intelligence who could not read or write, and there is a very fine line between laughing with and laughing at a person of this sort. I don’t intend to laugh at Fergie. Instead these anecdotes are offered simply to reflect the fact that the visit of the Accies to many lower league grounds over many years brought with it the rolling entertainment of Fergie’s foghorn voice abusing all and sundry, and almost everyone had a soft spot for the man, and looked forward to his appearance almost as much as to the game itself.
And, may I mention here, that in this politically correct age, Fergie, were he able to get to the games nowadays, would undoubtedly be ejected long before the match kicked off.
I realise that in this day and age there are quite a few shrinking violets attending football matches whose fragile sensibilities would be upset by Fergie’s industrial language, but almost all ‘old-style’ football fans will have fond memories of Fergie’s stupendous capacity for non-stop and repeated cascades of fearsome cursing. I had a sneaking admiration for the way he would arrive at ‘foreign’ grounds on his own, and immediately launch right into invective directed at the local shed crew. He seemed totally fearless, and totally unphased by being the personal target of abuse being returned by hundreds or thousands of opposition fans. Fending off volleys of mince pies and macaroon bars was all in an afternoon’s work for Fergie.
Even in the older more robust days, Fergie was frequently banned from the Accies ground. When he was banned for life in 1987, he turned up at the next game with a ladder propped against the wall, which he climbed up and began shouting louder than ever. Even quarantining him in the most remote part of the ground didn’t work because his voice could still be heard all over the ground, and all over Hamilton. And in Motherwell.
Anyway here are some Fergie memories -
First, I quote myself from TAG 22, March 1991 -
“…….some ’superfans’ gain a type of village idiot celebrity status by virtue of their mindless loyalty.
One such is ‘Fergie‘, who is Hamilton Accies most famous fan. Most readers will have heard, or heard of, Fergie. He’s a bit of a legend in his own lunchtime, mainly due to his foghorn voice which has been honed by years of selling evening papers on street corners. It’s only a small step from bawling
“Awrahauftimescoresaniracin” to yelling “Safuckincorneryablinbastartye” around the grounds of Scotland.
On one occasion Fergie was in Perth to watch the Accies against St Johnstone. The Accies lost badly. After the game, the Hamilton team bus was on the high road home when the driver spotted the lonely figure of Fergie trudging along in the dark trying to hitch a lift. The players unanimously decided to stop and pick the old bugger up. Ten minutes further along the road the bus stopped again and Fergie was forcibly ejected, he having spent the intervening time slagging the entire playing staff for their woeful performance that afternoon, in a colourful language which is uniquely his own.
And again, from TAG 42, March 1995
Derek (Johnstone) also told another funny story featuring a combination of referee, Brian McGinlay, and the legendary Hamilton Accies supporter known to his intimates by the single nomme de guerre of ‘Fergie’. McGinlay had refereed a local derby between Hamilton and Motherwell on the Saturday afternoon. Motherwell had won thanks to a couple of questionable decisions by McGinlay. In the evening, McGinlay and his wife were out for a meal in Glasgow. As they strolled along Sauchiehall Street, Brian saw Fergie standing on the street corner pursuing his alternative vocation as an ‘Evening Times’ seller. In order to avoid the inevitable confrontation he and his wife jouked into a nearby up-market wine-bar. As they sat sipping their Pimms in the genteel, oak-panelled lounge, the door was kicked open and Fergie breenged in roaring, “Errsyerfinal Times. Read all about it. Referee makes a complete cunt of it ——- again !!! ”.
I found some other recollections about Fergie, mainly on Pie and Bovril
Che Stadium (not his real name) recalls -
It was never a good idea to be the last one out of Ewings or the Bay Horse, as invariably the last seat on the Welfare bus was up front, behind the driver, sitting next to Fergie.
Never the most comfortable of journeys with Fergie flicking vickies and blowing rasperries at anything even remotely resembling a rival supporters bus.
Ye Old Hamilton remembers -
One of my favourite Fergie stories concerned a game at Douglas Park against Souness inspired Rangers.
The Rangers team bus made it’s way down the old Douglas Park Lane with the assembled throng uniting in salutation towards their noble leader.
Souness,spotted Fergie and came over to speak to him.Remember that this was just over a week since Souness had split up with his wife.
The conversation went like this:
Souness: “How you getting on Fergie?”
Fergie: “No bad Mr.Souness.”
Fergie : “Sorry to hear you split up with your wife.”
Souness: “Nice of you to say that Fergie.”
Fergie: Fergie duly made lewd sexual gesticulations saying to Souness
“You’ll no be getting any of that then.”
Cue a red-faced Souness rushing into the dressing room with all the Gers fans also pissing themselves laughing.
Reynard says
The first time I ever clapped eyes on him was the first season Accies spent in the premier division in the `80s. I don`t recall the game at all but I was at Gilmour Street waiting for the train to Ayr and a few Accies fans were on the opposite platform heading to Central when this wee fat mad looking guy with a booming voice appeared from the stairs shouting abuse at everyone in sight. This continued unabated for ten or fifteen minutes until the train came and he then hung out the window of the train shouting obscenities at us mainly and giving us the V sign and all the rest of it. The whole place was in uproar
Stepek’s anecdote is -
I remember a story about Alan Rough and Fergie. Rough was playing for Partick at Firhill and someone behind the goal was screaming abuse all through the game but the players he was abusing were all Accies players. Rough thought that was strange bacause it wasn’t Accies that Thistle were playing! After the game he approached the guy to find out why he was shouting the names of Accies players, it turns out it was Fergie he was living in Glasgow at the time and couldn’t afford the train fare to Hamilton so he went to Firhill to have his fix of screamin abuse for ninety minutes!!
GreenOak Ton gives a Morton Supporter’s view -
I remember a game at the old Douglas Park.It was played in a blizzard and Fergie was giving it plenty. The crowd were all crammed in under the shed and Fergie was out in snow looking like a snowman. The Morton support started chanting “Fergies a barrel, Fergies a barrel of shit, shit, shite, shite” (a song we used to sing when Alex Ferguson was manager of St Mirren.) Needless to say the game was abandoned after about 30 mins play and everyone was told over the tannoy to troop across the pitch to the stand to get a voucher for the replay match. So there’s everyone jogging over the pitch to get to front of the queue, both Accies and Ton supporters all mingled together giving it good humoured banter etc. All I remember next is this maniac shouting all sorts of obscenities and the crowd all shoving and mayhem ensues. Yep Fergie had arrived and was none too happy with anyone wearing blue and white after chanting he’s a barrel of shite. He is cuffing wee boys and shoving his way to front of the queue. Was the one time I saw a Morton support shite themselves.Come to think on it the Accies support shat themselves from him too. Hilarious. Football is about entertainment and we pay to be entertained. That day there was no entertainment to be had on the pitch but Fergie gave us all our moneys worth.
Elsewhere there are comments like -
Anyone who can stand behind a goal in all weathers repeatedly shouting “haw goalie, show us yer knickers” is deserving of cult status. (In fact, the winding up of the opposition goalie was one of Fergie’s specialities - he would stand behind the goal and graphically describe (per foghorn) what the goalkeeper’s wife was up to with the next door neighbour at that very moment)
He also possessed the loudest raspberry in Scottish football.
My lingering memory, though is that of George McLuskey kissing him full on the lips behind the goal after scoring the winner at Starks Park on a Wednesday night. One of the most courageous acts I have ever seen from a player in an Accies shirt
On the sad occasion of Fergie’s passing, I would hope the club would organise some sort of tribute such as a minutes swearing before a game.
Are you getting the picture?
Fergie was a fearsome swearing machine, but as almost every correspondent has pointed out, his speech was so indistinct that you really could not be sure precisely what he was actually saying.
As a couple of comments on Pie and Bovril had it -
Fergie had a unique way of winding himself up for a rant. He would frantically rub his hands together while cocking his head to the side with his tongue hanging out one side of his mouth!
Then start slapping the sponsor boards over the wall before starting with a shout along the lines of:
“G’an ya fuckin’ sher fye fuckin’ ferfshye“
I could not put it any better myself.
